• WORK
  • JOURNAL
  • Shop
  • About
  • CV
  • Contact
Menu

bernard brand

photographer & conceptual artist
  • WORK
  • JOURNAL
  • Shop
  • About
  • CV
  • Contact

I'm Not Crying, You're Crying - Stuart

April 4, 2023

This and the posts to follow have been a long time coming. When I first wanted to write about this it was a year and a half into the pandemic. A lot had happened and it also felt like absolutely nothing had happened. It was a weird limbo. A slow apocalypse - as I’d been “joking” with friends.

I’ve always felt like I don’t want to just write for the sake of writing, but to at least attempt to say something useful when doing so, but perhaps that is besides the point? Maybe writing and putting things out into the world is the point, whether I find it useful or not? But I digress.

In 2020 I was asked by my friend Stuart Trent to photograph him for a portrait idea he had in mind. He had seen the “Crying Men” series by Sam Taylor-Johnson and that is what sparked the idea for him.
We then got together one morning in November of 2020 behind his little framer/art gallery to make the portrait.


Before this even became a full fledged project my thoughts were - to have it feel even more vulnerable - that I would want him to sit without a shirt on, to give a perceived physical “nakedness” along with the emotional nakedness. Stuart would then sit with whatever emotion or feeling he would need to cry. In this instance it was a song that reminded him of his mother played on a loop as I waited for the appropriate moment to click the shutter.

This all sparked the larger idea to photograph men between the ages of 24 and 65 to come and sit for me and to talk about our feelings if that is what the sitter chose to do. For everyone it is different. Some want to talk, others need a song or a sight or a smell. Different senses to get to a place where the “dam walls” break and the facade we put up comes down and we can be truly human and vulnerable with one another. It is not an easy task and I am grateful for everyone who has sat and spoken to me about difficult things or shared something quietly without words. Those were sometimes the most powerful sittings for me and I hope for them as well.

I have several more of these portraits to share and will do small write-ups about them and my experience in retrospect. Most of them have been posted to my Instagram already, but I thought it a good idea to write about them here as well.

Thanks for reading. The following words are from Stuart.

 

While visiting my brother in Sydney Australia in 2006, we attended an exhibition of photos taken by
Sam Taylor-Wood. They were all photos of famous actors. They moved me (I was not a big crier).
Over the last 16 years I often think back to the exhibition.
Exhibition, 23 March – 21 May 2006, Museum of Contemporary Art Australia (MCA)

Three people very close to me died over a two-year period (3 rd January 2019 to 31 December 2020). I
had never truly understood loss as I do now (age 49). Time heals, but I cry often. “All’s changed
since”. (from the 3 rd verse of the poem referenced below)

Since 2009 artists know to me and my Gallery have been doing portraits of me. There are about 310
of them now. I approached Bernard to take a photo of me to represent this time of loss in my life, so
it could form part of the collection of portraits.

I attach the first verse of William Butler Yeats poem, The Wild Swans at Coole
The trees are in their autumn beauty,
The woodland paths are dry,
Under the October twilight the water
Mirrors a still sky;
Upon the brimming water among the stones
Are nine-and-fifty swans.

Tags Bernard Brand, Stuart Trent, Trent Gallery, Portraiture, Portrait, Crying, Vulnerability, Masculinity
← I'm Not Crying, You're Crying - EttThe Royals: A Fashion Story Collab →
  • December 2024
    • Dec 4, 2024 SuperUltra Design Agency Dec 4, 2024
  • November 2024
    • Nov 12, 2024 Camino de Santiago Day 10 - Sobrado to Santiago Nov 12, 2024
    • Nov 7, 2024 Camino de Santiago Day 9 - Vilalba to Sobrado Nov 7, 2024
    • Nov 4, 2024 Camino de Santiago Day 8 - Vilela to Vilalba Nov 4, 2024
  • October 2024
    • Oct 31, 2024 Camino de Santiago Day 7 - Cadavedo to Ribadeo to Vilela Oct 31, 2024
    • Oct 29, 2024 Camino de Santiago Day 6 - Aviles to Cadavedo Oct 29, 2024
    • Oct 28, 2024 Camino de Santiago Day 5 - Gijon to Aviles Oct 28, 2024
    • Oct 24, 2024 Camino de Santiago Day 4 - Pendueles to La Isla Oct 24, 2024
    • Oct 22, 2024 Camino de Santiago Day 3 - Boo de Pielagos to Pendueles Oct 22, 2024
    • Oct 21, 2024 Camino de Santiago Day 2 - Laredo to Boo de Pielagos Oct 21, 2024
    • Oct 18, 2024 Camino de Santiago Day 1 - Bilbao to Laredo Oct 18, 2024
  • February 2024
    • Feb 2, 2024 Boudoir: I did what? Feb 2, 2024
  • November 2023
    • Nov 27, 2023 I'm Not Crying, You're Crying - Stanley Nov 27, 2023
  • April 2023
    • Apr 26, 2023 I'm Not Crying, You're Crying - Henry Apr 26, 2023
    • Apr 11, 2023 I'm Not Crying, You're Crying - Ett Apr 11, 2023
    • Apr 4, 2023 I'm Not Crying, You're Crying - Stuart Apr 4, 2023
  • February 2023
    • Feb 1, 2023 The Royals: A Fashion Story Collab Feb 1, 2023
  • September 2022
    • Sep 29, 2022 Sittercity Sep 29, 2022
    • Sep 26, 2022 MINI Sep 26, 2022
    • Sep 16, 2022 Juanita Kotzé - The Rare Librarian Sep 16, 2022
  • August 2022
    • Aug 11, 2022 Rebecca and Michael Aug 11, 2022
  • July 2022
    • Jul 21, 2022 It's on Fire Jul 21, 2022
    • Jul 19, 2022 Comair: Unseen Work Jul 19, 2022
  • August 2020
    • Aug 11, 2020 Pandemic Stories//Dan Bakkes & Brendon Erasmus Aug 11, 2020
  • July 2020
    • Jul 21, 2020 Pandemic Stories//Elna Schutz Jul 21, 2020
    • Jul 1, 2020 Pandemic Stories//Jenna Burchell Jul 1, 2020
  • June 2020
    • Jun 19, 2020 Pandemic Stories//Charl du Plessis Jun 19, 2020
    • Jun 9, 2020 Pandemic Stories//Tshepo Mohlala Jun 9, 2020
    • Jun 8, 2020 Pandemic Stories//Johann Nortje Jun 8, 2020
    • Jun 3, 2020 Pandemic Stories//Puno Selesho Jun 3, 2020
  • May 2020
    • May 27, 2020 Pandemic Stories//Leanne Olivier May 27, 2020
    • May 22, 2020 Pandemic Stories//Double Shift May 22, 2020
  • September 2019
    • Sep 30, 2019 Colors Everywhere Sep 30, 2019
  • March 2019
    • Mar 11, 2019 Say Yes Mar 11, 2019
    • Mar 8, 2019 What am I trying to say? Mar 8, 2019
  • October 2018
    • Oct 9, 2018 Swim. Don't Drown Oct 9, 2018
  • August 2018
    • Aug 13, 2018 A C-Stand, a Suitcase and Switzerland Aug 13, 2018
  • December 2017
    • Dec 20, 2017 Travel Pt.1 (Switzerland) Dec 20, 2017
    • Dec 1, 2017 Perspective Pt.2 Dec 1, 2017
  • November 2017
    • Nov 27, 2017 Perspective Pt.1 Nov 27, 2017
  • September 2017
    • Sep 8, 2017 Conceptual Storytelling Photography Workshop Sep 8, 2017
  • June 2017
    • Jun 22, 2017 Creation & Art Jun 22, 2017
    • Jun 13, 2017 Holy shit... I'm back! Jun 13, 2017
  • January 2017
    • Jan 16, 2017 Vulnerability Jan 16, 2017
  • October 2016
    • Oct 4, 2016 Humdinger Tattoo Oct 4, 2016
  • September 2016
    • Sep 9, 2016 Bronson Sep 9, 2016
  • August 2016
    • Aug 15, 2016 Rebirth of Venus; in the Garden Aug 15, 2016
  • January 2016
    • Jan 29, 2016 StorySpace Jan 29, 2016
  • December 2015
    • Dec 30, 2015 Year One: What I've learnt Dec 30, 2015
  • November 2015
    • Nov 18, 2015 Engage Nov 18, 2015
  • October 2015
    • Oct 1, 2015 Wêreld Records (World Records) Oct 1, 2015
  • September 2015
    • Sep 22, 2015 Adapt or Die Sep 22, 2015
    • Sep 14, 2015 Workshop Sep 14, 2015
    • Sep 8, 2015 Failure Sep 8, 2015
    • Sep 1, 2015 Winter Sep 1, 2015
  • June 2015
    • Jun 24, 2015 Work Hard & Do Good Work Jun 24, 2015
  • May 2015
    • May 27, 2015 #MuslimNotExtremist May 27, 2015
  • April 2015
    • Apr 3, 2015 Pietà Apr 3, 2015
  • March 2015
    • Mar 20, 2015 The Ocean Doesn't Want Me - The Reins Mar 20, 2015
    • Mar 17, 2015 17 March 2014: A year in Review Mar 17, 2015
    • Mar 9, 2015 The Spanish Dancer Mar 9, 2015
  • January 2015
    • Jan 19, 2015 Sifting Through The Bullshit Jan 19, 2015
  • November 2014
    • Nov 13, 2014 What Now? Nov 13, 2014
  • September 2014
    • Sep 25, 2014 Take Chances Sep 25, 2014
  • August 2014
    • Aug 8, 2014 Droughts & Floods Aug 8, 2014
  • June 2014
    • Jun 12, 2014 Girls, girls, girls Jun 12, 2014
    • Jun 9, 2014 Photographing Loyiso Bala Jun 9, 2014
  • April 2014
    • Apr 24, 2014 Living in Beta Apr 24, 2014
    • Apr 23, 2014 Create. Fail. Retry. Apr 23, 2014
  • March 2014
    • Mar 18, 2014 Metamorphosis (Part 2) Mar 18, 2014
    • Mar 14, 2014 Metamorphosis (Part 1) Mar 14, 2014
  • January 2014
    • Jan 29, 2014 The Watermark High Jan 29, 2014
    • Jan 27, 2014 Remember that letter I wrote? Jan 27, 2014
    • Jan 2, 2014 Rebirth Jan 2, 2014
  • November 2013
    • Nov 11, 2013 So, here's the Plan Nov 11, 2013
  • September 2013
    • Sep 5, 2013 Fighting Personal Demons Sep 5, 2013
  • August 2013
    • Aug 13, 2013 What Next? Aug 13, 2013
  • July 2013
    • Jul 8, 2013 Confidence Jul 8, 2013
  • June 2013
    • Jun 18, 2013 The Exhibition Jun 18, 2013
    • Jun 12, 2013 Dudes With Beards Exhibition Jun 12, 2013
  • May 2013
    • May 15, 2013 Beard Portraits [An Update] May 15, 2013
  • April 2013
    • Apr 26, 2013 Dudes With Beards Apr 26, 2013
    • Apr 2, 2013 Welcome! Apr 2, 2013